I bought a new shirt, and it has Mr. T on it. Could I be any happier? Mr. T says, "SHUT UP, FOOL!" I also got my copy of the warcraft expansion--hooray. Let the addiction resume in full force! It's been a pretty good week overall. However, I'm still lacking on sleep and I doubt I will get much this weekend with company visiting *sigh*.

I'm really digging bass guitar, so far. I'm suprised at my ability to even do anything with a bass. As of now, playing some ac/dc, weezer, tom petty, green day, journey, and beatles. As soon as I have a moment to record again, I'll be able to lay down a semi-acceptable bass track...maybe. Oooh, my tax refund should be automatically deposited into my account today *runs off to check*.

Movie update: Descent - Lame, predictable, dark, and confusing.

The Night Listener - Hey, remember when Robin Williams played an old, gullible gay man? This movie wasn't too bad for an independent, but I wouldn't recommend it to everyone. It wasn't a great movie, and it wasn't a comedy, but it had a couple funny parts in it--very subtle, which I enjoy.

Every time I think my life is about to slip back into some semblence of normalcy, it kicks up again and I struggle to keep up with everything. There are about a million things on my plate right now. This last weekend was great, as I got to spend time with the deviants--my brother and hometown friends up in NorCali. I ate something I thought was 'Sake Seafood Delight', only to find out it was 'Bake Seafood Delight'...I guess that's one of those 'you had to have been there' moments. Trust me, it was funny...until the stomach ache. Picked up the Matteo to come down and finalize some things to move down here. I now have a roommate. Oddly enough, this has not stopped me from falling asleep, upright on the couch at 1am. We ended up at wal-mart last night, to pick up the burning crusade expansion to world of warcraft. On leaving the store, an old lady ahead of us set off the shoplifter alarm at the exit, and I helped out the old man guarding the door by squarely planting my foot in her back as she tried to run with a toddler in her cart. I also had to perform a small choke hold on the toddler. It turns out that checkout forgot to demagnetize her mariachi band cd in her cart. ...She shouldn't have tried to run.

New shirt in the STORE section of the site. Go chickety-check it out.

Movie update: Eragon - This was better than I expected, but not terribly great. It was entertaining, and a fun watch. A perfect movie to kick back with on a weekend. I've read most of the book, and I'm sure I annoyed the crap out of Matt, describing the differences. The books are definitely worth a read--the formula is not totally original, but the adventure is always great.

I just can't win. I'm having a very horrible day. Between pain and the annoyances of work, I'm about ready to blow a fuse. I want to punch something. I need to lay down in a cool, dark room, with nothing but silence. I'm just going to keep whining, so I will end this here. See you next week--hopefully, in a better mood.

Movie update: Lady in the Water - Honestly, this was one of the best movies I have seen in a while. It definitely had the feel of a bedtime story with elements of suspense thrown in. I know that some people had a gripe about everyone in the movie believing the whole situation right away--I had no problem with that. It was a different approach to the norm, and it was explained, if you paid attention. It was a simple story, and predictable at times, but that did not take the enjoyment away for me one bit. It's a modern fairy tale, people--stop being so critical.

Well, the Holidays are almost over, and it's already 'back to the grindstone'. I definitely miss being a kid; when holiday breaks lasted weeks, and we walked five miles in the snow...wearing reebok pumps. Christmas was good, but seemed to go by very quickly. Santa brought me some pretty cool gifts--stuff I could even kill a man with, and you all know how I likes ta' kill me a man. Currently wishing it would rain a bit more than it did this morning.

Movie update: You, Me, and Dupree - This one wasn't too bad, but pretty bland. It had a few funny parts. That's it.

Accepted - That movie with that dodgeball/Mac guy. I actually enjoyed this movie a lot. It was just a goofy comedy. It doesn't bombard you with shock humor like a lot of recent movies have. It was just a light, goofy comedy. I definitely enjoyed the Lewis Black scenes.

Nipple alert! Nipples and chrimmas go together like peas and carrots. I basically started thinking about Ping getting one gift from Santa--the first gift he's ever been good enough to receive--and what he would really want. I hope everyone has a nice Holiday. Please don't drink and drive...unless it's funny. No, I'm kidding, that's not funny at all, jeez. ...but seriously, if people are watching and it's funny, do it. Merry Chrimmas to all.

Movie update: Beerfest - Another one by the broken lizard crew. You can't watch their movies and just compare them to super troopers--that's not fair. However, how can you not watch their movies and do that? This one had a couple funny bits in it, but I tend to think they do a better job when they're not trying to score on the shock value jokes.

Pirates of the Carib...ee-uhn..., part 2; dead man's chest - Could the title be any longer? I cringe, thinking of what part three's title will be. Anyway, I heard a lot of bland reviews on this one. Friends who had seen it always came back with 'Eh, it was alright.' I thought this was a very entertaining sequel. I believe the majority were turned off with the light they cast on Sparrow's character, but I can clearly see that it's just story building up to the next release. The movie felt very long, as well. I kept thinking it would end at certain points, but would keep rolling along.

Day late, and a dollar in debt. Well, I'm officially never buying another chrimmas gift again (until next year). Jeez, I wish I could go into some type of suspended animation until the holiday gift giving gasm is over. That way, I could have a great excuse like, "I was schmoozing with Disney in the frozen head locker for a few weeks, sorry I couldn't get you a gift. Better luck next year, slugger!" Well, I'm not feeling all that well this week, and I'm super super tired, so I this message will now end. ...End.

p.s. This week's comic references the popular 'ding fries are done' song. If you haven't heard it already, go find it online. It also references the 'Sack to the Future' movie short, by the hilarious guys at sevenohfive.com

Movie update: The Ant Bully had my attention for about twenty minutes, and then I fell asleep. I'm sure it was a nice, cute movie, but the power of sleep compelled me. Clerks 2 --making the world realize that it's okay to say 'porch monkey'...and that donkey love is just another form of love. You know, I like Kevin Smith, but the endless dialogue makes me want to hurt myself. It's like egging on that kid that really shouldn't have attention, and he really just doesn't know when to stop, so he keeps going, and going, and--look, bunnies!

I'm back after a bit of a hiatus. Thank you for your concern, but nothing serious happened, no. I was just extremely busy, and tired during the Holidays. I had too much on my plate, basically. It was a nice little break, but I missed my comics, so...I IS BACK! I should be starting the chrimmas-themed omies soon, and I will be adding some new shirts to the store section. I've ordered a new laptop and a bunch of semi-pro recording equipment, so I will be unleashing some total buttrock music in the upcoming months--keep an eye out for that.

Movie update: Superman Returns wasn't too bad. I really liked how the lead character payed homage to the legend of Reeves by sounding almost exactly like him during most dialogue. The Da Vinci Code reminded me of the serious moments in IJ; and The Last Crusade. I am also now totally crushed on the beautiful French actress; Audrey Tatou. She reminds me somewhat of a gorgeous friend of mine. I wonder if I'm allowed back into France yet...hmmm.

Q-tips are a gift from heaven above, I swear to you. I've been pretty busy the last week, and will be for the next couple of weeks, so I'm going to try and get some omies done in advance, but the shizzy comics will go dormant for that time. I just don't have the ability to work on it through it all.

Movie update: Nacho Libre deserves a definite 'WTF?' after something like napoleon dynamite. While it had a couple of good chuckles out of it, the rest was just too boring for me, and I'm told that I like weird/bad movies. On the other hand, Click was fun with some serious tones. I like the direction Sandler is heading now, with his movies--a la' 50 First Dates. Also, Christopher Walken needs to star in every movie, as every role from this point on. So I have said, let it be so.

The captain of the crunch lives in my cupboard. I actually have a couple of boxes of cereal in my kitchen! Wee-oooh! I normally don't have any cereal at my place, but they were on sale. Sadly, I think I've run out of milk. I need to ransack the local von's again. I also need to restock my supply of henry weinhardt's vanilla cream sodas. My toilet has a leak--Heh heh, get it? Leak! ...but seriously, it does.

I hope everyone had a nice halloween. I had the evil chicken hat of death stuck to my head all day, compelling me to do bad things. I was not happy. Oh, I've changed the news section, for now, so that the older news articles/random images are listed all on a page of their own. That should cut down the long load times and infinite scrolling here, on the main page.

Movie update: Monster house was hilarious, and the animation was well done. X-men 3 could have been a lot better. YOU CAN'T INCINERATE CAPTAIN PICARD, JACKAL! My friend Jackal believes that good ol' xavier is completely dead, but I beg to differ. No one can kill Jean Luc Picard!

Woo hoo, I'm no longer limping, but my leg is still killing me. I guess that means winning the UFC championship is out of the question, for now. Oh, and thanks to the skillful scissor wizard at supercuts, I'm now 80% less shaggy looking. My thanks to you :) . I'm a day late updating this week, due to a lot of updates I'm working on, as well as this week's special, random image extravaganza. I hope to have a couple of new shirt designs soon, too. ...I just totally spaced on some things I was going to mention, but it really doesn't matter anyway. See you all next week. Happy Hurruhreen!

I've decided to put together a dozen or so random images, all with a costume theme, for this week's random image. It started off as a quest for the most horrible costumes I could find, and then it just devolved into something I can't even describe. Freakshow fascination? Click the images for a larger version.

After a long weekend of travelling and tiredness, I decided to take a quick nap on my lunchbreak, on Monday. When I woke up, I put my shoes on and was traipsing downstairs groggily, until I got to the last handful of steps. I stepped down, really large for some reason--I attribute this to my sub-conscious desire to die--and I totally ate arse down the rest of the stairs until I landed on my knee on the concrete. Thankfully, I didn't break anything, but I've been taking a lot of vicodin, and limping around. As if life is not bad enough, now I have a limp until it heals up. The vicodin has been fun, but it gives me a bad hangover, which reminds me why I hate pills so much.

When I wake up in the morning, I also scream, "...AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE...BUT I WONT DO...my HAIRRRRR!!!"

I saw boobs this week, but more importantly--they saw me! Still not dead yet. See you all next week.

If yuh' want my bodeh', and yuh' think I'm sexseh, c'mon baby let me knooowww! We have a piper down. I repeat--a piper is down!

I almost took another week off from the demanding, fast-paced life of webcomic publishing, however, I realized that if I sit on the toilet too long, my leg falls asleep. I'm looking forward to finishing this week up, as it's been a long one and I'm severely tired. Battlestar Galactica, Jericho, and Heroes are AWESOME shows on tv right now. Check them out. Alright, I'm going to keep this short, since I can't seem to concentrate very well, at the moment.

Amazing crap I've seen on youtube this week:
Hindi Michael Jackson - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ll8Qm8yDj-8
Scary woMAN Rap about bathing - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GautSlgAsN0

When I grow up, I'm growing a mullet, buying a mini-bike, and then I'm off to the mcD's parking lot to chase the hell out of people just walking by. I wonder if I could do some donuts on a hog that bitchin'? REEEEEENEEEENENENENENEEEE!!!

No comics this week. I've run into some issues that are taking my full attention, and I will be out of town for the weekend. Sorry, everyone. See you all next week.

Where did cotton-eyed joe really come from? Alright, I now officially know too many close friends playing WoW, and am running into voice server limitations with ventrilo. Hopefully that will all be worked out in the near future. Last night I had some funky dreams (not going into that further). So, September is winding down to its end, and I'm still pumping out the comics. Jeez, I need a nap. I watched an antonio banderes movie the other night. I just laughed at myself. I still have a couple more dvds to go through--some brit football deal, and some french deal by the same guy that made 'the professional'. Yikes. Have a good weekend, ya'll.

It took me a couple of times before I started losing it on this one. Cats move so fast when you have zero coordination. The slow build up to tears after the attack cracks me up. "I don't know what the hell just happened, but it wasn't good...and I've pooped myself."

I've found out that I'm not very funny. No, not very funny at all. No. So, I've decided to stop it. Stop it right now! I'm no longer going to be funny. That's it, the funny has stopped right...now. I've decided that eventually, I will have omie and ping stuffed dolls that will be available through the site. It won't be for a while, as I don't have the dough to drop on it just yet, but possibly in a year or so. If you would like one, save up for it. I'm sure they won't be that expensive. The price should be around eleventeen-hundred-million-billion dollars each. There I go again, being funny. I apologize. No more of that from me, I promise.

This picture reminds me of my own jack russel terrier, who was born without a real dog's head, but rather a men's shoe. We lovingly called him shoe-face, and laughed for hours when he'd jump up on someone, only to kick them in the crotch with his face.

I've still been really busy. With the holiday this past week, and the occasional insane busy rush at work, I bring this week's update a day late. Not too bad, considering all that's been going on. I've also been a bit under the weather. I was going to go and harrass a few people up in my hometown this weekend, but I've changed my mind, so I can rest up. Anyone who wants to come over and baby me until I feel better is more than welcome...if you bring nuggets of meat. See you hippies next week!

This week's random image; I picked this up somewhere the other week and couldn't stop laughing. He deserves his own cartoon character.

It's been so busy, I couldn't even get the comic done on Wednesday, this week. I'm a failure, boob hoo. So anyway, here's another wow comic--not that it's worth my time. I still have fun coming up with wow jokes, however. I figured if I make them less funny, maybe they'll be posted on their site, since that seems to be how it works so far. Uh oh, my comic has an understandable joke, and fairly decent artwork--definitely can't be posted now, no way. Oh yeah, my friends and I are now dangerous--we have a mixer and some recording microphones. Anyone want to drum for us? We definitely need it, er, once we figure out how all o' them mixer knobs should be fiddled wit'. Glad it's Friday. I need another weekend pretty badly. Three day weekend, woo hoo! See you all next week!

This week's random image; AHHH! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!

I can't sleep anymore. I'm convinced that I'm dying. I'm not sure of what yet, but we'll see. Alright, so comics are now on Wednesdays, because I needed the extra day...for slacking. This will help me continue to crank out the comics as 'on time' as possible for you--my fanbase of about three. Who loves you? Me do! So, I found out that you can get totally smashed on alcoholic beverages in the world of warcraft game. Needless to say, I've spent two nights and a lot of game gold getting completely wasted, and streaking through the center of town, screaming and singing horrible songs. New distraction: directv with DVR. Oh yes, I'm back in the game. I can now dvr all of my shows to watch at a more convenient time. Too bad I can't watch tv consciously while being asleep--that would save so much time!

This week's random image; a thank you to my friend Steve is in order for this one. TMNT; The Album. Coming out of their shells (and maybe a closet or two).

As usual, I'm tired and hungry. Had a good visit with buddies this last weekend, but I got home late and haven't been able to catch up on my two weeks of sleep deprivation, as of yet. I think I had about five hours of sleep the entire weekend to top it off. Well, this is the first month I won't have to make a car payment--woo hoo. Of course, that just means that my credit card banks are going 'woo hoo' as I pay them more. I'm still deciding whether or not to change the update day to Wednesday, but it may happen next week.

This week's random image; One of the many 'tard run' images out there. All I have to say is, "RUN, NEO...RUN!!!"

You know, my friend Matt makes a good point about zombies--only the fresh ones would give you a problem, unless you know of a way a corpse can get through a coffin and six feet of packed dirt and vegetation. The other thing I thought of, would be an issue with teeth. There is no way teeth would stay attached to a crusty, rotted jaw. At most, you'd get the worst gumming of your life...and not in a good way. Ah well, I still love zombie movies. I mean, when you can say you've seen 'Hard Rock Zombies', and lived to tell the tale, you have to love 'em. I'll be up in the Northern reaches of Cali this weekend, visiting my family, and my posse. Looking forward to a swim more than anything else. In other news, I'm thinking of changing the comic update day to Wednesday, since that seems to be a bit more convenient for me. I may just do that.

This week's random image; Okay, not so random, but it is what my new girl looks like. A left-handed ovation celebrity. I've named her Ms. Parker . I love her tone, and will be doing some mild upgrades on her soon, including bone nut & saddle, and slapping on some steel strings. Mmm-MMM, what a fox!

Alright, Willy Wonka songs are still floating around in my head after singing them last night over voice chat, during some gaming. ...there is no place I know that compares with pure imagination... So, I've been playing the game a little much lately, but it's alright, at least I've taken some friends down with me. Mwhaha! Last week was one hot week, and I'm missing the nice cool weather pretty badly. I've been seriously busy with things, and haven't had time for much (pretend I didn't mention anything about gaming), which is why today's comic is a bit delayed. This is the second submission of a WoW-themed comic to the blizzard comic contest. Last month, a comic that wasn't very funny won the monthly prize, even though it wasn't original due to its resemblence of a certain P. Arcade comic strip, which sponsors the contest. Lame, and unsuprising. I thought two other comics completely blew that copy-cat comic out of the water. This reminds me why I dislike P. Arcade. ...heh, I said P.

This week's random image; I once heard someone say that if you don't have anything nice to say, you shouldn't say anything at all. Obviously, that person has never been to a large gathering of nerds that worship games and comics. This image gets worse the more I look at it...Oh, the pain!

Man, what a tiring week! I almost didn't get the comics up today, since I was busy as all funky this last week. Visiting family, partying, going out of town...I is tired. I got Verizon to put out and upgrade me to a new cell phone. Hooray, it has a useless lame little camera on it! Also, while hanging out Saturday I happened by a guitar center and caved in. Oh yes, I have a new six-stringed girlfriend--an ovation celebrity now known as Ms. Parker. She's like buttuh. I'll post a picture up when I take one. I got a haircut today, and boy do I look funny. I need to get them to leave a little more hair on top. Speaking of stupid hair...

This week's random image; Mr. T, how many times do I have to tell you not to wrassle with Boy George, no matter how much he begs?! You know what, you're just going to have to learn the hard way, this time. I give up.

This week's comic may seem a bit random. It's theme is based on the MMORPG; World of Warcraft. If you don't know what 'MMORPG' means, then I will hold back my swift wedgie of doom. I've been playing a lot of the aforementioned game, and it's pretty freakin' fun. Anyway, this week's edition was also submitted to a comic competition that the game is running. I will most likely enter in each month, so there may be a few more game-themed editions popping up now-and-then. In other news--I've paid off my car (hooray!), upgraded my cell phone (hooray!), and discovered that Elton John isn't straight (when did this happen!?).

This week's random image; The bloke that put this together is a genius! A uke-wah setup. ...And all the island girls singin', doo doot-doo doot-doo, doot-doo doo...

Everytime I go home for lunch, and turn on the tv, I catch those lame 'belly fat' diet pill ads. They're such garbage. Everyone knows stress makes fat go to your head. Speaking of fat head...

This week's random image; I have seen the holy land...and they have burritos...the size of asian heads. GLORY!

So much stuff happening each week. With the holiday, I was a bit delayed again this week, but it's up--don't hurt me...much. This week's comic is definitely inspired by my push to have 'Come Sail Away' played as a first song at my friends's upcoming wedding. Who wouldn't love that masterpiece? I even offered to sing it. Can you believe that!? How could you turn that down? Well, I'm still beat from the week of Matteo and the weekend of J-dawg 7. It was definitely good times. I was groped many many times. Until next week--say no to the drugs.

This week's random image; pictures from my 4th of July. Party at Landon & Kristin's. Threw a couple other similar pictures of the night on the pics o' stuff page.

As I mentioned last week, this week's edition would be a bit late. I was on a semi-vacation while my buddy Matt visits. So far, we stole money from the red man, scared the yellow man, permenently damaged our digestive systems, and have seen a thousand men in nutter shorts recently. This week has been dubbed, 'The week of a thousand nutters'. Old men in short-shorts, walking around as if their kiwis weren't on display. We're still keeping count, and have hit nutter number seven, so far. Alright, I'm off to stock up on more food, see you all next week.

This week's random image; Learning disability jobs, part 2.

Okay, so world of warcraft is evil and I've spent a lot of time playing it. I finally found a character I like playing as, which makes me want to play it more. I'm sure I'll get bored with it soon. In other news, I may be late next week in posting the comic. My bruthuh' Matteo will be in from out of town and staying with me for a bit. There will be much hell raised. This week's song in my head is by Jermaine Stewart, simply stating that we don't have to take our clothes off, to have a good time. 80's flashback--watch the video here. Alright ya'll, see you next edition.

If you have a learning disability, you may not want to be the guy who paints words that people see and rely on every day. That is, unless you're in California. No one uses sotp signs here.

Back again, with this week's edition. I tribute mario a lot over in my Shizzy comic, but this was the first time in an omie comic. I'm a bit tired today. I caved in and got a copy of world of warcraft, since I haven't played any games in a while. I was up way too late last night, starting out my angry scottish dwarf. He was already pretty cool, but he randomly made a boner joke, and it was true love ever since. I guess I could say, "You had me at boner joke." Did I mention I'm exhausted today? Oh, the other week I added a bunch of custom IM-type avatars in the downloads section. They're sized for MSN, but can also be used in trillian etc.

I found this image on a random search and couldn't stop laughing. I rip on Keanu's acting ability all the time, and his entire history of acting emotion is summed up beautifully with this one word.

Woo hoo, it's 6/6/06...who cares? Okay, now that that is done with--it's been a good week, except for yesterday. Today's comic was posted a bit late in the day, because I was out sick yesterday and wasn't feeling very funny at all. I mean, except for the part about making puking noises while I harfed out my innards...that was pretty funny, in retrospect. Well, I just finished the comic five minutes before my work day deadline, so I'm safe, and I'm ending this here. See you next week for more insanity.

I made this week's random image two seconds after I saw this image. An overactive imagination, and eleventeen years of graphic design can accomplish pretty much anything.

ICE CREAM MAN!!! This is the summertime call of the suburban youth. I have to hold back years of Pavlov-type training whenever I hear any type of childhood song set to a blaring loudspeaker. Well, that and looking around for an adult to bum a dollar off of. A dollar didn't buy the best stuff, but it did get something cold. Growing up, there was a time when the ice cream truck would still come around, but another ice cream delivery service found its way into our hearts, in the form of lightning fast, blue go-karts. They'd jam down the street at 45mph speeds, blasting music. If they caught sight of you in their rear-view mirror--since they were so fast that even the normal lightning speed ice cream reflex was too slow to catch them--they'd flip a u-turn and come back. Not only did they have all the ice cream you could want in that little speed machine, but they also had the best treat ever--ice cold ring pops. They were around for a few summers, and then they disappeared. I salute you, go-kart ice cream service, for being the best danged ice cream delivery, in my youth.

Thanks to Richie with the site wylfwt.com, for sending me this week's random image. I think my reputation for burrito lovin' is too well known.
Also included, is a link to a new image in a series of concept sketches I'm doing, based on characters from David Eddings's Belgariad/Mallorean book series.

Did I mention I got a sword for my birthday? Oh yeah. It freaking rules. I've already been swinging it around and talking with a badly dubbed english voice over. It's only a matter of time before I accidently sever something. I must put the sword on display in my apartment. Poshibly near my bruce lee posters. Hey, don't judge me! At least I don't have a star wars fetish--eugh! Star wars-y people freak me out. Weirdos. Okay, so I've watched a lot of crappy movies this past week, like king kong and some other crap I slept through. I also watched Grandma's Boy, and the Ringer. Those two weren't that bad, but they weren't that great, either. I expected them to be funnier. Thankgoodness I'm easily entertained.

My big boss silk screen poster, hanging in my bedroom. Oh yes. This is the best poster ever! Not only is it the mastuh', but he is holding escrima sticks, as well. BOOYEAH!

After my vacation, I find that I'm now older, funnier looking, and sunburned. I didn't just get a normal sunburn, no. I tried to get some sun on my legs, and ended up just getting sunburned on my knees. How in the hell? I got a sweet katana for my birthday, which means I just need to get my handgun, and my hard leather body armor, and I'll be ready for the zombie invation. Oh yeah, I decimated some fried chicken pieces, and a curly potato today, and now I'm working on a cup of delicious mt. dew. Mmm...

Conan O'brien's walker texas ranger lever is the funniest thing that exists on this planet. Go and do a search for 'walker texas ranger lever conan' on a search engine, and find the five or so videos of conan pulling a lever and displaying a few random snippets from the walker texas ranger show. It makes me want to pee my pants.

Three more days until the glorious celebration of my existence. I'm ditching all of you suckers and going on vacation for a few days. Oh yeah! Well, that's it really. See you all next week.

I believe Rainbow Brite's house was designed by the same architect who designed neptune's castle in Little Mermaid--the one with the spire that oddly resembled a wang.

Sorry Victoria, I had to do it. This comic is dedicated, in part, to my friend. I give her such crap about her lack of concent...BUNNIES!!! Love me? Anyone else tired? Jeez, do I need some sleep. Hey, you know what else...nachos aren't as good as they used to be. I'd like the week to be over already. Why? Because next week is my buh-buh-buh-Birthdayyy. The celebration will be one spoken of for like, uhhh...a year, or something. I'm old...any young women out there want to take care of me? I need lovin'--I mean, love before I die. The only rule, is that you can't have bigger hands than I do...or a bigger 'stache than I do.

FINALLY out on dvd--the complete series of Odyssey 5! MWEHE *excited*!!! This was a short-lived showtime series that was so freaking enjoyable. I've been waiting for years for this to come out on DVD, and I've now added it to my collection *dvdgasm*. The premise of the show, is a group of people on a shuttle mission who witness the world implode. From the help of a mysterious being, their conscious minds are sent back five years in their past, to try and stop the catastrophic event. The cast meshes really well, and the episodes don't follow one style alone, often shifting from comedic, to dark, to thriller. There's still a chance the series will be picked up again, hopefully by a network that doesn't cut it just because they don't want 'sci-fi' anymore.

Alright, I semi-suck at board games. I will, however, beat the living crap out of anyone in a game of candyland. I'm not very competitive. Of course, Ping would just say that's because I'm a "tubby fat white". Psh! Please--like you wouldn't go all Augustus Gloop if you found yourself in a land of candy. If you want to view paradise, simply look around and view it. Anything you want to, do it. Wanta' change the world? There's nothing...to it.

Recently enjoyed some DVDs of the nickelodeon original animated series: Avatar; The Last Airbender. It's very entertaining, and the combination of excellent animation and great voice acting really makes it. Some of the voice talent includes Mako (voice of Aku on Samurai Jack), and Dante Basco (Rufio, from the motion picture Hook). I always wondered what happened to that Rufio kid...

So, I'm trying to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life. I don't think I'll ever go to school for illustration, since that may take the fun out of it. Although, just saying that might inspire me to. I'd love to work for the cartoon network, but I think I may go back to school and get a piece of paper that declares I'm totally 'badical' at English. I mean, unless I die first. I really don't care, at this point.

I saved this image a long while back, of Vader and Obi wan duking it out. The whole time I had it saved, I kept seeing one of those dorky 'LOLZ!' comments on it, in my mind. So I added them. It's funny. HUH HUH HUD!

I kept seeing all sorts of T-Rex references the other week, and it seemed to inspire this week's comic. I wish I had a T-Rex to sick on people when they piss me off. There would be quite a path of blood and gore after that rampage. I'd name him Fluffy, and we would play fetch at the park. I'd have to hire a whole team of people to scoop his poop. That'd be excellent! Hm, this sort of reminds me of the show Denver the last Dinosaur. ...I hated that cartoon.

Here's another Sporty Jeebus statue. My favorite so far! Not only does it prove that Jeebus is, as I knew it, the master of all martial arts, but he's totally encouraging these kids to beat the crap out of eachother. That little boy is about two seconds from getting a serious gooch punch. Does anyone else note the similarity between Jeebus and "Fuggin" Chug Norris in this one? Oh, and I can't forget to point out that it states that jeebus is their 'coach'. Not only that, but that the girl is wearing a pink belt. No wonder she's pissed--she's getting the 'just for girls' belt.

Food poisoning sucks. I think that evil ninja clan is still trying to 'off' me by poisoning my food. I mean, I've gotten to the point now, where I'm afraid to get fast food. Not that I really like it, but I never know when i'll need the convenience. I spent this last weekend sick out of my mind, keeping the toilet company, while simultaneously sleeping all day and night. In other news: I'm not a yo-yo master. I will never be a yo-yo master. I suck at the yo-yo. There, now that I've said it, I can move on to the next distraction I think I can master.

Here's another Sporty Jeebus statue. I'll have more next week. The sarcasm is heavy when I look at this one and say, "Yeah, that isn't creepy."

I got a yo-yo, I got a yo-yo! Just sit there and stew in your jealousy. That's right, now that I have a yo-yo, my plans at world domination have begun. This week's comic was inspired by that obviously stupid question that interviewers do ask, but also by the fact that I've been a bit morbid lately. Maybe I should start directing crappy movies and call myself Tim Burton.

Here's a couple thumbnails from a side project I've been fiddling with, the last two weeks. In my spare moments, I've been sketching up concept characters from David Eddings' book series; The Belgariad. I've been reading this series again, and am in the second set of five called The Mallorean. I plan to eventually have around eleven or twelve of these concept characters done. I've been doing them in a style somewhat comic/coloring book, and it's new to me. It's a challenge I enjoy. So far, the characters Silk (prince kheldar), and Belgarath have been completed. If you're unfamiliar with the series, and you have an open mind for the fantasy genre, I recommend picking up this series. More will eventually posted over the upcoming weeks, in my Art Portfolio > Sketches area.

I'm not into soccer/football, nor is there any valid reason this comic came into existence. Well, that's not true--PELE RULES! Remember that movie he was in, where he escaped from the Nazis, with Sylvester Stallone? That movie ruled! Okay, so Tuesdays still blow, and now the weekends are starting to piss me off. I have nothing to do anymore. Anyone want to entertain me this Saturday? By entertain, I mean fondle me...

Move over soccer moms, here comes the J-man. He'd have to be the a god to play soccer in sandals--that's a miracle. The best thing about this REAL statue, is the fact that it looks like jeebus just elbowed that kid out of the way, to get at the ball.

Everyone knows I'm always concerned with being ready for the zombie invasion. I'll be stockpiling my weapons/ammo soon, getting food and water ready, and fortifying my apartment. Part of this plan includes the ingenious idea of using chainmail or hard leather as body armor. Oh yes, I will be bite-proof. Think about it--there's always that one dimwit in the group of survivors who gets bitten and then slowly turns so he can take out another of the group. I'm not going to be that chode.

This week's random picture is something I cooked up in photoshop, after joking with my buddy Matt on the phone. I had the most beautiful though while talking--"What if the fuggin chug was the terminator?" Behold--the Chuginator.

Alright, I'm exhausted. It's been a tiring week. After the quick vacation weekend, and some busy-ness at work, I'm a bit late with this week's comic. Do you know how frustrating it is to do a tiny bit of a comic at a time, while being interrupted every two minutes? Is the week over yet, because I am crapped out. Netflix better send me some great movies this week. Oh, I see one of them is the new hairy potter movie. Speaking of hairy pooter...

This week's random picture is in anticipation of the DVD release of the new Harry Potter film. Oh yes, I will watch it this week. There's nothing wrong with liking Harry Potter. Look, even tubby Canadian children, and little ninja girls LOVE the potter, and we all know there's nothing cooler than tubby canadian children and ninja girls. NOTHING *tantrum*!

I'm still horribly scarred from just trying to watch the movie Rent. Crap like that needs to come with six or seven warning stickers all over it, and a sweaty persian man that tells you how bad it is--ALWAYS! I could only take about half of the movie, after walking away several times, before completely giving up on it as total and absolute plop. In other news, I was able to re-attach the scrote, which was then, promptly punched by both shlibby and karen, while using my Omie style of martial arts against me.

This week's random picture is a dedication to all of the losers online who match the description. Oh yes, they will argue with you--not very well, but that doesn't seem to phase them much. They try so hard.

I was a little late this week, due to the holiday, but we're going to pretend the comic was posted on Tuesday. Oh yes. In other news, I'm never going to sleep again. Oh, and I'm really really hungry right now.

This week's random picture is a very rare occurrence that happens in many ball pits. Most people don't realize the deadly creatures that lurk below the surface.

I was going to totally ignore Valentine's day, as far as the comic theme went, but it just came out when I started in on it. Last week sucked! This week may not be as bad...I hope. Alright, I'm going to go back to nursing this can of dew and creating more useless crap to infiltrate the int-or-net!

This week's random picture is one of the funniest things I've ever seen. I'm not even going to add my own thoughts to it, because it doesn't need it. Enjoy.

Why is it not socially acceptable for me to ask people, "how's it hangin'?" while in the men's restroom? You'd think I'd just busted serious azz and didn't courtesy flush, or something. This just in: sammiches are good, and so is sleep. I've had a lot of one this week, and not the other. Can you guess whic--*snore* Added a new shirt to the store section, so go check it out, my narcoleptic friends.

Oh yeah, and dodgeball is one of the best movies ever filmed, so CRAM IT UP YOUR CRAM-HOLE!

This week's random picture is an example of how spelling isn't an important skill, when designing lame banner ads online. Hooray, a career field has been opened for those who can't spell or design properly.

"I want 'ter be a dirt digger!"
"You get to be in the exciting field of graphic design."
"Field? Like, 'fer diggin' in? I likes to dig! Yippee!"

WOLVERINES!!! Okay, I have it out of my system now. This week was very uneventful, but that's okay, because I had to catch up on some sleep. The rest of this week should be pretty killer, though, since I have a friend coming to visit from out of town for the weekend. Oh yes, good times. Remember, don't forget to leave Shizzy unloved--go read shizzy comics!

This week's random picture is an original. I don't expect most people to understand it, so I'll include a brief explanation. After seeing the last line in the movie dodgeball, the matteo and I started saying 'F'in Chuck Norris', which later became, 'Fuggin Chuck Norris'. That eventually became 'Fuggin Chug Norris', which became 'Fuggin Chug', or 'The Fuggin Chug'. It was an inside joke that sort of evolved into complete obscurity.

What an interesting week it's been. I've been working to get the world of Shizzy out there, so that people can see it, and that seems to going well...I guess. I also had the chance to meet someone very amazing, that I've known for quite some time online. You made my apartment smell girly!

Don't forget to check out the recently edited 'Peace Through Superior Firepower' t-shirts in the store.

This week's random picture is one of the rarest events known to man--the asian-spike-ullet. I don't miss 1990 at all.

Taxes filed and accepted, people. Oh yes, now I must await my massive return from 'the man'. Notice that 'the man' makes an appearance in this week's comic as the bunghole that keeps bogarting most of my paychecks. There are two things I love about this comic:

1) Omie's funny little arms in cell one. They look so cute, like little oompa-loompa arms.

2) My obvious inability to draw the star shape. I've had this problem as long as I can remember. I can't draw a decent star to save my life. I kept trying to fix them, but eventually said 'screw it', and left the tarded stars as they were. Enjoy.

This week's random picture brings back so many memories. Ah yes, my generation. My sad, sad generation...

I'm waiting for the 12th of the month, since I will then be able to file my 2005 taxes. Oh yes, it will be glorious. Do you see what I have to look forward to? I hope and pray that I catch a stray drive-by bullet soon. You know, I've been sleeping a lot lately, going to bed very early. They say that depressed people sleep a lot, but one thing can be said about depressed people who do--they're very well rested. I feel a little better, now that I'm not depriving myself of so much sleep. You know, this thing called 'breakfast' isn't so bad, either. Mmmm, flavored oatmeal. Today was maple & brown sugar. Don't forget to visit the Shizzy strip.

This week's random picture doesn't leave a lot to be said--it just is, and should not be questioned. Let the joke of the whole hoff-soap dispensing 'action' seep in slowly...

Yes, the holidays are over! Mwhah...Mwhaha...MWHAHAHA*coughcough*. So, now it's just the looong stretch until May--the month of my famous birth. Get your present shopping done now, so that you will avoid the shopping rush, when all the world is out looking for that last-minute gift for me. Does anyone else feel stupendously lazy after the holidays? I mean, it may just be that I am actually stupendously lazy (no argument), but it seems that it's been amplified. Oh well, I guess I'll just 'keep on truckin'!

This week's random picture has been replaced with the preview image of a new shirt in the store section of the site. Those who know what parody this shirt is of, I'm sorry--so very sorry.

HAPPY NEW YEAR, and something something. Hope you all had a good '05. Too many holidays in a week's time. I was so tired from chrimmas, that I didn't feel like doing up a four-panel new year comic. Hooray for lazy that will stretch into 2006! Well, I'd rather be sleeping right about now, but I have things to do. See you next week.

This week's random picture is brought to you by family killing ninjas. If the bums around my local grocery store had need like this, I'd give them some of my dough.

The feud with Santa is over...for this year!!! He will think twice about messing with Omie, next time! So, I've almost completed my chrimmas shopping, and I'm really not looking forward to the last bit, which involves me making another trip to a store to finish getting the last of the gifts I need to get. Gah! Ah well, it will all be over soon. I'm listening to some winamp radio stations that play chrimmas music, and what do I hear--new kids on the block. Good hell! I thought they were all dead! What kind of station subjects its listeners to that kind of torture? I mean, other than the kind that play Kenny G christmas non-stop.

Sending out wishes for everyone to have happy holidays. Thanks for reading :)

This week's random picture is proof that you should never trust your kids with a skinny santa.

Ah yes, the Holidays. You know, I love Christmas and the holidays around this time of year, but I really do loathe the whole holiday shopping madness. I wrote something about an experience I had one Christmas, holiday shopping the night before Chrimmas Eve. I'll have to find that piece and post it here. I caught 'It's a Charlie Brown Christmas' on tv the other night. I'm hoping to see a lot of other Chrimmas movies, since that always seems to usher in some of the old holiday memories. It's also been a lot of fun to go out walking late at night, to view people's decorations, and beat the piss out of those inflated lawn figures.

This week's random picture is dedicated to one member of Clan Biznitch, who has been offline for far too long. Colin 'the jew', named for his wanton destruction of fresh bagels, with a side of cream cheese. Clan Biznitch misses you...jewish bastage!

Stupid facial hair. Well, I survived another week...*sarcasm* hooray. I'm still tired, and still tortured by nightmares, however, last night's dream involved a pretty hot 'shlady'. Bought a new xbox game, well, the game itself isn't new, but it's the first time I've played it. It's burnout 3; takedown. This game is a lot of fun to play, and since it's an EA title, reminds me a lot of need for speed; underground, which I played an ungodly amount of, in 2003/2004. Oh, and I also watched the first season of Pete & Pete on DVD. There's not enough I can say about this show, which I used to watch years ago. It seems to have only aged with perfection, and proves to me that it really was before its time.

This week's random picture is a tribute to Artie; THE STRONGEST MAN...IN THE WORLD! MWHAH! *pose*. I'm going to make an artie tribute shirt, so keep your eyes peeled for that.